Tale of the Flatulent Physician

As promised, I bring you the story of the tale of the flatulent physician. In the ICU, our doctor's manage the patient's care, but their primary care doctors come in and check on them, get updated. One of these doctors is old. Really old. I think he could have gone to high school with Grandpa. He may remember "The Great War" from back in the day. In reality, he has lost his car in the parking lot before and a nurse had to go help him find it.

So, this really old doctor was talking to me about his patient, when he began to pass gas. Not just an accidental toot, but a long, stream of gaseous bursts. It was all I could do to continue to keep nodding with a poker face. A nurse was in a patient's room about ten feet behind the doctor. The ongoing sound caught her attention, and the look on her face changed to horror and disgust when she realized where it was coming from. Seeing her made it all that more difficult to keep a straight face.

By the way, the doctor was talking to me about some orders he wrote for the patient. As it turns out, the treatment he ordered is so obsolete, the hospital doesn't own the equipment anymore.